She’s Uninhibited, She’s Adventurous, She’s sexy and She knows it. Razi Shaikh Explores the Lure of the ‘Bad Girl’ and Why Men Fall for Her Time and Again
We celebrate the idea of this specimen of womankind in films and books alike. Men love her; women secretly wish to let out their wild side to be the bad girl. The bad girl is the one who breaks the norms and sets herself free. Someone who is wild and has no particular love for the status quo. Someone who is all about experimenting. Wild, crazy, unpredictable, you say the words for her and they’ll fill this page. But that’s not the point. Question is what makes her click for the guys?
Rutika Yeolekar, a mass media student says, “The things which are hard to get are the ones that are most desirable. Most guys desire and lust for girls in a sexual way. What happens if the girl turns the tables, uses the guy and walks away like nothing happened? That’s when the girl throws an open challenge to the guy’s psyche of girls being vulnerable.”
The Indian Jugaad
No household is complete without stories of the father having a crush on a college hottie. You’ll be forgiven for thinking why that hottie didn’t land up with your father. Blame it on the Indian psyche of having fun; living the moment with the bad girl and in the end, settling for the girl who will manage the house with limited candour, lesser troubles and more of agreement than disagreements. Very far from the notion of the bad girl. Thankfully, times are changing. The modern-day man who is modern in the real sense will be more than willing to accept the bad girl as his spouse, provided the other nuts and bolts of the relationship work out fine.
The Power Game
Yes, men like to be the one in charge. They like to be the one calling the shots in a relationship most of the time, but a change in routine doesn’t necessarily turn them off. Instead, a man will certainly be aroused if he sees his partner taking charge of things (not in bed alone!). Nothing arouses a man more than seeing a confident female. This, however, doesn’t apply to the entire breed of men. You can find that this quest for a power-centric woman is mostly limited to guys who are looking for an adventure – those looking for something other than the run-of-the-mill kind of girl.
Echoing that sentiment, Aditya Raste, an engineering student says, “What guys will always like about girls is looks. At the same time, intellect and attitude of the girl matter. A rebellious nature attracts a guy as it signals an air of confidence and independence.”
Out of the Ordinary
Ever heard that variety is the spice of life? Old phrases apart, this statement goes both for the guy and the girl in our equation. The guy on his part would love nothing more than a girl who has a wild side and doesn’t shy from showing it. For the guy, falling in love with a girl who stands out in the crowd is but inevitable. Every time he goes out with her, everything from her obvious confidence to her sexy figure will make others go green with envy.
At the same time, one would do well to remember that handling her won’t be the easiest of affairs. You can expect some rough bumps on the way; you’ll be at your wits end on some days on how to deal with her. Most of all, the dream of a long-lasting relationship from day one will be shattered for the guy because there’s not much to ride on the hope that it’ll actually happen.
Men Just Want One Thing
A conversation about this topic among a group of male friends brought one word to everyone’s lips. Sex.
Sex figures in the universal statement that is used to describe a man and it is based on a kernel of truth. Body language guru Allan Pease’s book Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love has a title that most ladies swear by. The bad girl knows this best and, instead of preaching on the virtues of love, makes the most of of her man’s wishes.
No, we’re not implying a bad girl is your ticket to quick sex in any way. But we can say that if nothing else, she’ll make the ride a lot more interesting.
Morality Be Damned
Damned, for the simple reason that morality isn’t part of the picture here. Yes, mainstream Bollywood would like us to believe otherwise but the idea of a bad girl isn’t based on what’s right and wrong but what works for her. If she makes a guy go weak in his knees, it’s as much for the promise of having an adventure ahead in his life as for the prospect of having a partner who is strong enough to separate her from the rest. She’s smart, she plays around and she has her vices too, but in the end, she draws the men’s attention.
If it works for the guy, he would accept his girl, in all her avatars. At the end of the day, it’s not about her being good or bad. It’s about the girl, for she is who she chooses to be.
To Handle the ‘Bad Girl’
- Pining for her openly isn’t going to help you one bit. Play it out slowly.
- Patience – required to deal with every girl but this one demands it all the more.
- Balance the egos. Not just hers, yours as well.
- Be a sport. Your joyride will go haywire if you refuse to jump on the fun bandwagon.
- Get serious, only if the relationship starts going that way.
‘There are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.’
MAE WEST, late Hollywood actress
Volume 2 Issue 10
