So, you’ve finally decided to take your relationship to the next level by introducing your partner to your inner circle – your parents. We’re sure the move so far has been nothing short of nerve-wracking. You’re anxious as to how both the parties will react to each other – if they will be cordial or if they’d even want to see each other ever again. Calm down. Take a breath and follow these simple rules mentioned by Shazia Shaikh to avoid a relationship shipwreck before you even make it to the shore.
IS THE TIME RIGHT?
This is the most important detail to consider. Ask yourself if your partner deserves to be part of your life, or if you honestly have your heart with him/her. At the end of the day, it is you who has to bear with the consequences of your actions and not your parents. Ask yourself, “Do I really want to see this person’s face every morning when I wake up, even if it’s not the prettiest?” Consider the pros and cons of this long-term commitment. Analyze all the aspects of your relationship. If the answer is yes, then it’s definitely a GO!
PREPARE BOTH THE PARTIES
Tell your parents well in advance that you would like them to meet someone you’ve been seeing for a while. Make sure you tell them how you feel about your relationship. Feel free to answer any questions regarding his/her career, family background, etc. Be honest with them. At the same time be careful not to represent your boy or girlfriend in a bad light.
You should also help your better half get over their nervousness. Tell them a little about your parents, their personalities, their likes and dislikes and how they’d react to this meeting. Telling them about their interests would make it easier for him/her to engage them in a good conversation.
THE PLACE
Decide a place that would be convenient and comfortable for your partner as well as your folks. It’s important to make sure that the location is non-intrusive and comfortable for a meeting like this. If your partner has agreed to dining at your residence, then fix up that. Whereas, if you both think a louder place with more people is needed to disguise awkward silences, choose a restaurant. A dinner or lunch at a classy local restaurant should make everyone happy and might also relax your partner.
THE WARDROBE
This is undoubtedly the most essential thing to consider. Your dressing style reflects your personality. What your partner wears can make all the difference about how your parents might end up feeling about them. Whatever they decide to wear, make sure it is not over-done. Ladies, avoid too much make-up and excess skinshow. Guys, shorts, baggy jeans and slippers are a no-no.
BRING A PRESENT
Rule of thumb when visiting your partner’s parents – make sure to pick a special gift. It will imply that you care about your relationship and more importantly, that you are trying to make an impression. It can be something as simple as a bouquet of flowers or a classic music album, a box of chocolates or even some kind of dessert. Whether the place of meeting is a restaurant or your partner’s residence, you must bring a gift.
THE AWAITED MOMENT
So after all the preparations, it’s finally time to face your parents. Come to think of it, it’s not that difficult a task. It’s just like introducing your partner to your roomies, except that they are 20 years older and a lot more judging. Since the gift has already been picked, your partner can present it. Take the step in initiating the conversation.
If sports or politics are common interests, you can bring them up. It will ease the tension of the moment and encourage conversation. Make sure to prepare your partner for the serious questions that your parents might throw at him/her. If you sense awkwardness, don’t switch to defence mode immediately. Stay calm and let them do the talking.
INAPPROPRIATE UTTERANCES
“Your daughter is safe with me. I’m Batman.”
“Your son is a really good kisser!”
“I can see where your daughter gets her curves from.”
“As much as I’m attracted to your son, I think you are way more handsome.”
I’m Batman.” “Your son is a really good kisser!”
“I can see where your daughter gets her curves from.”
“As much as I’m attracted to your son, I think you are way more handsome.”
THE CONCLUSION
You told your parents you were serious about your better half; now it’s their turn to make sure they feel the same way. If the meeting does fail to go as planned, make sure you have plan B tucked under your sleeve, as with all other plans in life. Let your parents know that the meeting is going to end soon; make a polite excuse and leave with your partner.
On the other hand, if all of this goes well, the signs won’t be hard to read. If your mom invites your sweetheart for casual family occasions or get-togethers, then they’re definitely a keeper in their eyes. So good luck, follow the rules, and take it easy. Everything will be just fine.
