Besties Give Great Pep Talks, But Therapists Help You Heal!

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We live in a very digitally connected world where FOMO ( Fear of missing out) is real and everyone is living their best life on social media, it is very common to think that many of us are still feeling dumb and disconnected. Many of us feel anxious due to issues within broken homes and dysfunctional families. Academic struggles and feelings of lagging behind peers further add to helplessness.  Usually, we would turn to parents, grandparents or siblings for help but due to nuclear families and fast-paced life often leave little time for connection. Also, everybody is so caught up in their routines that it is difficult to share one’s feelings easily. Thus individuals find it difficult to find solace in their immediate families which makes open communication challenging. 

We usually vent to our friends in the form of late-night chats, emotional dumps, and shared frustrations for the time being. But does this fleeting sense of relief help us in the long run? Or are we certainly mistaking the temporary sympathetic validation for actual empathetic healing? 

The Stigma Surrounding Professional Therapy

Despite growing awareness of mental health issues, asking for help is considered significantly weak. It’s a prevailing belief that people seek therapy because of the inability to manage their lives independently. This understanding is particularly prevalent in societies that highly value self-reliance. This stigma leads individuals to avoid professional help, fearing judgment or social repercussions. Most individuals opt to confide in friends or family members instead of looking out for long-term mental health improvement with the help of a psychological expert. 

Limitations of informal venting

Opening up to your friends and cribbing about things is awesome. It engages in a sense of social support contributing to the solace of “I am not alone”. Also, it is enjoyable to just blabber about each other’s life where there is no systematic organization of thoughts which thus ends as an unaddressed issue. Friends and family, despite their best intentions, may offer good advice but they do not have a professional responsibility to remain unbiased. They also have a tendency to offer solutions based on their experiences and exposure so there are limitations on the advice offered.. You even sometimes might agree to something your friend has said even though it doesn’t align with how you feel or how important it is to you. When a topic is extremely sensitive and your friends’ responses might be a little triggering but considering you are already overwhelmed by your issues, you might not have the energy to fight it. Thus, your friends are not aware if something is bothering you and are unable to help you in the right manner. This dynamic potentially entails the importance of seeking professional help while dealing with persistent psychological distress. 

The value of professional therapy

Now, in contrast, therapists navigate you to find a way through your problems and find answers that are most beneficial to your values. Therapists effectively comprehend the way you want your life to look and the way you want your life to feel, so the conversation and the healing are all about YOU. Professional therapy is tailored to the individual’s needs further fostering sustainable personal growth and emotional resilience. Professional guidance in the counselling relationship enables the individual to explore their thoughts and emotions. Embracing therapy whenever necessary provides individuals with the support needed to address mental health challenges effectively. 

The Unlearning curve: Dismantling the fear of therapy

Aamir Khan, a famous Bollywood actor, in a recent interview, openly discussed how therapy made him introspect over terms such as emotions, relationships, and self-awareness. He shared his personal experience with therapy, clarifying its transformative impact. Now this raises an important question: if a public figure with immense life experience understands the need for professional guidance then why do many of us still resist it? The answer lies in unlearning. We should mindfully unlearn the learned and understand that it is the most courageous step one can take. Therapy isn’t about fixing yourself but rather it’s a process of finally confronting things that you have been pushing for years. 

We are a part of a society that is quick to judge others and wants us to conform to certain norms. We are a part of a culture that glorifies hustle and grind and in-your-face success. But what if therapy and healing aren’t just about venting to a friend and suppressing emotions, but about unravelling those emotions, and finding meaning in them? Living an entire life where your struggles are just overshadowed by momentary distractions- be it through oversharing with friends or burying yourself in total denial- while the real issues remain unaddressed. So, the choice is between temporary escape and real, transformative healing. 

So the next time you find yourself drowning just remember that besties give you the best pep talks but therapists help you heal! 

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