“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”- Steve Furtick
The desire to be liked is something we all look out for. In today’s social media era this desire to be liked has grown even more. The number of followers and likes a person has on their Instagram account determines how popular they are. Even if these followers and likes are rigid and paid for. Competition builds up and all we are fighting for are numbers that identify our status in life.
Social media is the part and parcel of our daily lives. It’s hard to not be a part of this clique unless you are coming from the dinosaur age and are not tech savvy. This medium is supposed to be fun and exciting. Documenting and sharing your life with an audience is the most amazing thing that has ever been created. It’s just like a modern day journal.
Then how is it that people feel depressed while using this modern day journal? The feeling of insecurity creeps in when you stop believing in yourself. This feeling occurs because we spend almost 8 hours of our day on these social media sites. Social media is all about gaining attention due to which people publicize their picture perfect lives. We constantly tend to judge ourselves for not having that branded watch our friend posted or visiting that new and happening club in town. Kids these days might just want to visit a particular restaurant or buy a branded product so that they could take an artsy picture of their Starbucks coffee or Addidas All star original shoes.
The fear of missing out (FOMO) is another phobia occurring in today’s youth. This happens when an individual sees the extravagant lifestyle of another individual on social media. They feel depressed that they are spending their weekend alone binge watching Netflix shows while their friends are out partying at a nightclub or visiting the Eiffel Tower at Paris. The fun or enjoyment behind those pictures can even be hyped up and staged. But what you see on a post is what you get and this makes people feel left out because they do not get to be a part of this. It develops feelings of loneliness, misery and envy which are not good for your self-esteem.
Girls feel even more insecure about their presence on social media. They are constantly making sure that they look thin and fit in a picture, that their make up is on point and they aren’t showing too much skin. The comments are usually harsh and judgmental on a girls profile page. This has adverse effects on their personal lives as well as their mental health. If suppose someone spots them in real life they need to show people they are exactly the same as they are on social media. The most common fear is being called out by saying, “She doesn’t look anything like her Instagram photos.”
We are constantly seeking for gratification from others to validate ourselves. We stress out if we don’t get more than 50 likes on a picture that we posted an hour ago. Some people resort to taking down their picture. Then there are others who spend hours taking a high quality picture or a perfect selfie, editing them and promoting them with popular hashtags.
Young Adults feel insecure too while scrolling through their Facebook feed and noticing that all their friends are either getting married, getting engaged or having a kid. It’s hard not to let this affect you but it does.
We go out of the way to make our lives look way more attractive to our followers. Not realizing that we are creating a persona for people to like us and not revealing the real us. Social media accounts represent the personality of a person and how they are in real life. This shouldn’t be changed just because a certain group of people don’t believe in your views on twitter.
How can you avoid feeling insecure? Believe in yourself. And show the world what you really are. Do not seek for likes or followers but seek for real friends who will be by your side no matter what. Take a break from social media. I know it’s not easy to let go but try to minimize daily and gradually give it up. You can even delete your account or delete the app from your phone and login after you feel better. Sometimes you just need to let go and log off for a while until this voice inside our subconscious mind stops lowering down our self-esteem.
So the next time you see someone going offline, encourage and support their decision instead of mimicking them. Spread positive comments on people’s social media feeds. Embrace individuality on social media. Lastly, you are in control of your happiness don’t let those harsh comments get to you.