Pritika Behrawala makes an attempt to increase the list of national holidays keeping in mind the peculiarities of the country and its inhabitants, so gear up as the list unfolds
10. Make a Viral Video Day
Does grooving to the beats of South star Dhanush’s Kolaveri Di or South Korean rapper Psy’s Gangnam Style make you feel envious of them? Are you wondering when you too shall become a viral sensation? Then this is the perfect day for you. Make a video of a weird talent you, your parents, cat, dog or friend possesses and upload it to YouTube. Lady Luck might just shine and make you richer and more famous than Mr Shahrukh Khan, and if not, at least more your neighbourhood rival.
9. Annoy Your Rickshaw Driver Day
We’re tired of being bullied by auto rickshaw and taxi drivers. They go on strike every second day and hike prices every weekend. It’s about time we take revenge. Let’s celebrate this day by asking questions like “Bhaiya, yeh taxi mein TV kyu nahin hain?” (Why isn’t there a TV in this taxi?), “Dubai jaane ka kitna lete ho?” (How much do you charge to go to Dubai?) or “Aapka hairstyle aisa kyun hain?” (Why is your hairstyle like this?). Warning: stop before you are chucked out of the vehicle.
8. Pass Your Blame Day
How would you feel if you weren’t blamed for losing important files, breaking up with your girlfriend or messing up your best friend’s birthday? Pass Your Blame Day allows you to not take responsibility or feel guilty for anything that you may (or may not) have done. On the contrary, you pass on your blame to someone else – your strongest competitor, your worst enemy or even your extremely sweet sibling. We can already see an evil grin on your face.
7. No Curfew Day
Indian parents are a bit conservative and want their children to come back home early as per given deadlines. They feel that there are deadly monsters outside ready to molest, kidnap or murder their kids. But imagine a No Curfew Day where people won’t have to adhere to deadlines, where you can return home whenever you want and party all night without getting scared of breaking the rules or getting death threats from your parents. Don’t get carried away, though. It’s only one day.
6. Male PMS Day
Girls always say, “Please bear with me because it’s that time of the month!” They yell, crib, throw tantrums and get weird mood swings during this time. Only murdering someone isn’t permitted. But don’t you think men too deserve one such day in the year? On Male PMS Day, men can pick fights, act like the world’s ending, whine like babies, eat tubs of ice-cream and bars of chocolate and have no one say a word. Have you guys already marked this day on your calendar?
5. Scare Your Relatives Off Day
Indians need to constantly please and socialise with their relatives so that they don’t become an outcast or the topic of gossiping sessions. They can drop in at your place any time they wish and your parents expect best behaviour from you. You can get rid of your relatives by observing this day. Come up with foolish, mean, scary tactics to shoo them off and derive sadistic pleasure from it. Speak in a language they don’t understand, act eccentrically in front of their kids or say that your house is haunted. Then sit back and watch them run.
4. Bollywood Drama Day
Have you ever felt like saying “Rishtey mein toh hum tumhare baap lagte hain, naam hai Shahenshah” or “Mein tumhare bachche ki ma banne wali hun!” or dress up like Katrina Kaif and dance to Chikni Chameli in the middle of your lectures? If yes, then your prayers have been answered. On Bollywood Drama Day you can fulfil all your Bollywood fantasies by dressing, dancing, talking and acting like your favourite characters without even sounding cheesy. High voltage melodrama and oodles of fun is guaranteed on this day.
3. Take a Chance Day
Do you want to do a lot of things but are afraid of the consequences? Are you unsure about your chance in succeeding at it? Life is too short, my friend! Take a Chance Day is when you take a leap into the unknown, unaware of what the future has in store for you. Ask out the cutie you are always eyeing, get rid of your fear of heights or go to work in your comfy pyjamas. It’s time you stepped out of your comfort zone!
2. Scam Free Day
Does reading the newspaper scare you as you might come across another scam wherein your money has been pocketed by that ugly-looking, fat politician? Does your blood boil when you see that person roaming scot-free, chilling in his/her palatial house? Maybe a Scam Free Day can help. Come up with small ways with which you can contribute towards stopping corruption. Don’t give bribes or fall prey to devious tricks of people who try to loot you. Don’t stand in queues at administrative offices. For a day you will feel relieved.
1. Be on Time Day
This day might seem a bit difficult to follow because it is fashionable to be late in India. Nothing starts on time here, neither the Parliament sessions, nor the Mumbai local trains or even weddings. Beings punctual is considered sinful. But imagine a day when everything functions on time. Set your alarm clocks, avoid TV and sleep early as you can’t be late on Be on Time Day.
Volume 2 Issue 7
