Decoding The Mother-Son And Father-Daughter Relationship

I am going to begin with stating the obvious fact that I am my daddy’s little girl, and will continue to be one till the very last day of my life. Almost every girl is a daddy’s girl at heart, don’t you think so? This father-daughter relationship is one of a kind. A similar bond is shared between mothers and sons.  Just as girls are daddy’s little girl’, guys are ‘mumma’s boy’. 

Even after trying to develop the same bond with my mom that I have with my dad a multiple time, the only failure fell in my hands. As a result, I accepted defeat and gave up.  You just cannot share the same bond with both your mom and dad. I challenge you. It’s always different with the two of them. Why? Well, that’s a complicated question. 

Though we know what a mother-son and father-daughter relationship is like, we don’t really know why these two are so special. Still, somehow I have attempted to decode these two dynamics. 

If you have observed closely, these two dynamics are very similar to each other. For a son, his mother will always be the most beautiful woman in his life and will always come before any other woman, be it his sister or wife. Similarly for a daughter, her father will be her first love and the only true hero of her life.

In an Indian household, if a mother prepares ‘panch pakwaan’ for her son and doesn’t let him finish his meal without saying “kitna kam khaya tune, dekh kitna dubla ho gaya hai”, a father too gets his daughter her favorite delicacies while returning home from work and makes sure to tell her, “tujhe jitna khana hai utna kha”. 

If a mother gets offended when anyone points out her son’s flaws, then a father too protects his daughter from every minor as well as major problem. That’s just how these two relationships function. 

One of the key and most logical reasons behind why a son-mother and father-daughter relationship gels so well is because opposite genders attract. A daughter feels most beautiful, precious, cared, comfortable and safe around her father. A son, on the other hand, feels charmed when around his mother due to her constant appreciation of his qualities and not to forget, his good looks. In addition to this, a son finds it safe to openly share his feelings and show his weakness only to his mother without feeling the need to demonstrate his ‘macho’ side. 

Fathers too have always found comfort in sharing their emotions openly with their daughters than with anyone else. For a father, his daughter is like his second mother. Rightly so, a daughter won’t once crib if her father tells her to give him a nice ‘tel champi’, but a son will hardly ever be there around his fathers for him to even ask his son to do any work of his, leave aside a good long head massage. 

Mothers too find comfort in sharing their feelings and emotions with their sons, when their husbands are busy paying bills and attending work meetings all day long. A mother not just finds a confidante in her son, but also a friend whom she can gossip with endlessly.  

There is no doubt that these dynamics are strong, but they are also important for the child’s development. Studies state that girls who share a strong bond with their fathers develop an attribute of maintaining their romantic relationships with their partner efficiently, understand men better, are emotionally strong, self-reliant, and put on immense confidence. 

Moreover, in times when issues like self-doubt and lack of self-worth have gripped almost every single person, daughters with loving fathers carry immense self-worth, self-confidence and do not feel the need of any kind of validation from anyone else. The kind of partner a woman looks for highly depends on how her father treats her. If a woman is raised with immense love, respect and care by her father, she will accept the same or even more from her partner in the future. 

Those boys who are close to their mothers are usually more affectionate, soft-hearted and slightly reflect their mother’s femininity. A son close to his mother is also more emotionally secure and has less behavioral problems. A boy who understands his mother’s feelings well is more capable of understanding his partner’s emotions as well. Such boys do not shy away from situations that demand dealing with it emotionally and also are good at expressing and communicating their feelings much better; something not all boys are good at. 

This said, every mother loves her daughter and every father loves his son equally, just a little differently (in case you took my words in the wrong way). Let’s also not forget though that there are exceptions as always. Not all sons are close to their mothers and not all daughters are close to their fathers. Some sons find more comfort in sharing a bond with their fathers and vice versa and such dynamics too are beautiful.