It’s Okay To Be A Woman Who Refuses To Embrace Motherhood

The elder section of the Indian society, especially women, are often found giving newly married women suggestions like  “Motherhood completes a woman”, “Just give birth to a baby and all of your problems will be solved”, “Becoming a mother is the best feeling ever. You should start planning a family”, etc.  Hearing these statements on a daily basis can be quite a pain, to be honest! I mean, all a woman has to do is to look out for herself, for the society to raise its eyebrows. 

Women who refuse to accept motherhood are often disliked and judged by society. In the worst of Indian scenarios, when a woman finally decides to have a baby due to the incessant pressure, the society judges even more if she delivers a baby girl, and then they pester her again to give birth to a second child. If the woman is a working professional, they judge her for ignoring the child. This guilt makes her quit work and focus on honing her motherhood skills. This is how a woman loses her self-confidence, resulting in the society to search for another such woman and then following suite. 

There is no pleasing such people. It is best to ignore them because the reasons why some couples agree on not having kids are genuine and spot-on.

1. Pregnancy physically changes a woman’s body

The cravings, labour, and breastfeeding take a major toll on a woman’s body. I could say that men have almost died pushing out kidney-stones of negligible radii, while women are expected to push out eight-pound humans all the time. However, it would be wrong to say that since a male and a female body is made to be biologically different. That is in fact the exact reason why women should be given the first priority while discussing children.

2. State of the world is in shambles considering social, economic and environmental factors.

The number of kidnapping, gun violence, child abuse and other violent cases are bound to scare anyone. Global warming and climate change are bringing the world to a rapid end by creating unhealthy conditions to live. The population is on an ever-increasing rate and the resources are falling short for everyone. Under such critical situations, it is important to think about the future and ask yourself if it would really be fair to the baby. Instead, you could adopt a child to secure his/her future and experience happiness and content like never before.

3. Career is considered an important factor.

It is hard for certain people in the society to believe that women with career goals exist. A career-driven woman often scares many. Despite the orthodox society, some girls manage to protect their dreams while growing up and are driven to constantly work upon them. They have worked just as hard as the boys, at times, probably twice as hard as the boys to realise their dreams. So, women prioritising their career over children shouldn’t be frowned upon.

4. Maintaining a work-life balance is difficult.

Badass women all over the world have balanced their life flawlessly around work and family, and that too with creepy male colleagues, misogynist bosses and obstinate clients. However, it is ridiculous to expect a woman to work and simultaneously raise a child. Indian men are raised to find themselves uncomfortable in a kitchen. How do you suppose we expect their help while raising a child?

5. No reason at all

It is wrong to force motherhood upon women because it would not result in the welfare of either the woman or the child. Women should not be required to give reasons for every single decision that they make.

Let us do away with the social stigma surrounding a childless woman and just let a woman be!