When Kamasutra is OK But Sex ED is Not

Ignorance or plain obstinacy – whatever the case may be, Indian politicians want no sex education for kids in school. Why is the land of Kamasutra iffy about sex?

SURVEY THESE SEX-RELATED ADVICES AND OPINIONS FROM AROUND THE WORLD:
“If you have short hair and dress like a boy, you will become a lesbian.” – nun in an Indian convent school “Taking daily showers will keep me safe from STDs.” – a 13-year-old boy to his mother “If you have sex, you will die!” – Coach Carr in the movie Mean Girls (couldn’t resist including this)
This kind of ignorance is growing and triggering a rise in sex-related problems like sexual harassment, rape, teenage pregnancy, etc in India. And yet, our politicians have decried sex education entirely. Their excuses: such classes will embarrass female teachers; sex education is against Indian culture; and abstinence is the remedy to sex crimes.
Of course it is abstinence that has brought our population to 1.2 billion! As for Indian culture and values, what about Kamasutra? Or the erotic sculptures that adorn the temples of Khajuraho? Are they not representative of Indian culture? Sex education does not mean showing children how to have sex, it is about their bodies, puberty, conception, pregnancy, ontraceptives, rape and sexually transmitted diseases.
The more children are forbidden from knowing something, the more they will crave for it. In the absence of guidance from teachers and parents, they will turn to their friends (who are as ill-informed as they are) and porn. They might also pick up coffee table versions of Kamasutra, hoping to see some grisly and graphic pictures. But the truth is that Kamasutra is not merely a ‘sex for dummies’ manual; it is a relationship guide. Sex only forms a part of the work. The rest of it is about how to get a wife, the duties of a wife, how a man and woman should behave with each other, how to meet women, how to stay friends with an ex, how to run a family and even how to make money!

WHAT NOBODY TELLS YOU ABOUT SEX
In the absence of reliable and formal sex education, movies, books, magazines and porn (don’t deny it) usually becomethe first educators of sex. They make the act seem exciting, romantic, empowering and ‘cool’. But they are all a work of fiction and like all fiction, they are exaggerated.

PORN IS DECEPTIVE
If you’ve indulged in the guilty pleasure of watching porn, you would’ve seen people with unrealistic body proportions. Porn makes people believe that they need to be generously endowed in their privates to have good sex, that sex must be like drilling a jackhammer and that body hair is bad (porn actors are magically hairless). All lies.
Sex is the art of satisfying a partner with what you have, irrespective of its size. And doing it like a jackhammer is no fun. Also, hair on the body is normal. Trimming is okay, but being hairless is not necessary.

SEXUALITY IS FLUID
If you’re a straight guy or girl, but has on occasion seen other guys or girls respectively and thought they were attractive, don’t be ashamed. Considering someone of the same sex attractive does not make you gay (homosexuality is not bad anyway, but that discussion is larger than the scope of this article). It’s human nature to appreciate beauty, wherever it may be. Like everything in nature, sexuality is also not uniform, so be comfortable with it and enjoy it.

IF YOU DON’T LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY, YOU’LL PROBABLY SUCK AT SEX
The choice to lose your virginity is yours and yours alone. Young people often feel pressured to sleep with their boy/girlfriend. Sometimes boys accuse girls of not loving them if girls don’t have sex with them.
If you don’t feel comfortable with the thought of having sex, you aren’t ready to lose your virginity. Also, girls, if your boyfriend says “If you don’t sleep with me, you don’t love me” moans, dump him. He doesn’t love or respect you.
No matter at what age you lose your virginity, your first time will be awkward, uncomfortable and perhaps even painful. Practice makes perfect. Just because someone has lost their virginity at a younger age doesn’t mean they are the
king of the bedroom.

OTHER THINGS NOBODY TELLS YOU
• Masturbation is a healthy release of pent-up urges and relieves frustration, confusion and hormonal aggravation. But indulging in it all the time is dangerous.
• Period time is painful for girls and they are likely to be more moody, snappy and uninterested in sex at this time. Unprotected sex during her period is not risk-free; the chances of getting pregnant are low but not entirely nil. Always, always use a condom.
• Everyone is turned on by something different. There is no universal definition for what constitutes ‘sexy’.
• Don’t assume your partner will always know how to satisfy you in bed. If you aren’t vocal about what you like and dislike, sex will not be fun.

Volume 2 Issue 6