Youth Incorporated Magazine

When you’re single, spending quality time with friends is easy. For the most part, you are with yourself, and the weekend is the only thing on your agenda to catch up with your friends. But when you’re embraced by love, albeit unintentionally, you easily start neglecting those friends around you. The sheer euphoria of a new romantic relationship can be overwhelming. Nothing can beat ‘can’t sleep, miss you, can’t eat without you.’ We all have been there and know how it goes. Suddenly you’re so smitten by these new feelings that you tempt to sail into the sunset and plan weddings. Everything is roses and violins.

The danger arises when you become so addicted to your partner that you completely throw yourself into that relationship, leaving no time and space for friends and family. While many might understand why your romantic  relationship is your priority, it can get so terrible that the other beautiful relationships you’ve nurtured for a long time fade into oblivion. Unfortunately, it’s a classic situation faced by many these days. 

Why does this happen?

‘Choose between love or friendship.’ This is a common theme explored in many TV shows where everything is fine and happy in the end. But in reality, things can take a worse turn, and your friends and family go by the wayside.

There is a ground-breaking theory for why we disregard other areas of our lives during such times. In a new romantic relationship, we would really like to present our best selves to our new partner, and we focus on this new relationship to figure out if it will actually last.

In reality, you don’t need to devote much time around your partner to know if it will work out. The thing is, there is only so much time in a day.  Other facets of our lives will definitely suffer when something new enters. This is how folks begin to drift away.

Even though this love has completely swept you off your feet, we do need to strike a balance. So what can you do to strike a balance between your friends and partner during your ‘honeymoon’ phase? 

Find your feet

We all know the style: we promise a lifetime of friendship, but as soon as a new love interest enters the picture, things really start to go south. I’ll be honest; we have all done it. It’s a terrible thing to do. The whole point of having friends is that you don’t have to move through life alone.

True friendship can withstand sincerity and transparency. So start being open with your partner and your friends about what is most important to you. When you suddenly start spending less and less time with friends, withdrawal symptoms are bound to rise. Probably, you two will argue needlessly.

Your friends were there even before your partner entered your life. Whether romantic or not, relationships require a lot of time and effort. It is a two-way road; if you give up, they will perish! Expecting your partner to be the only person who understands and supports you is unreasonable. Anything in excess is toxic.

There is nothing wrong with always wanting to share your thoughts and opinions with your partner. Friends, on the other hand, are the people who would genuinely hear you and offer you a dose of reality.

Having friends gives us another person to look forward to seeing and celebrating different shades of life. Both relationships are equally important and should be nurtured and handled with care. Make an effort to be in touch; technology makes it easier for us. Of course, technology can’t be the only source – meet your friends; we will always need some tea, gossip, laughter, and a hug. So as long as you are compassionate with both, the ship of life will sail a long, long way!