Dealing with a Crush

Okay, so there is that one cute guy or girl who has been haunting your existence. A person who has as good as encroached upon your life; someone who you can’t stop thinking about for the better part of your conscious state. Butterflies in the stomach, a racing heartbeat, sweat accumulating. The mere sight of that person makes you feel like you are in a different world altogether. These, my friends are the sure shot signs of having a crush on someone.
Blush, blush, blush! If you are one of the many (actually all) who happen to be experiencing a crush right now, worry not, help is here. If sniggering friends and the thought of risking a hard earned reputation isn’t enough, there’s that perennial question hanging in the air: Should I or should I not? “Dealing with one’s crush can be a highly awkward moment! For a guy, it’s easier to tackle a bull by the horns than to deal with his crush. Meanwhile, to ask or not still remains the question!” says Pranav Kamat.
Having a crush can perhaps be the most painful, yet beautiful thing. Living in a well-foamed bubble, smiling randomly and coming across as someone seriously afflicted, it won’t be too long before you feel that you either need to face your crush or the rest of the world. Such times call for urgent measures. You may get your crush and we sincerely hope so. But till then, retain your sanity. Thinking about your crush all day long can seriously damage your daily life. Try and immerse yourself in something productive such as exercise, socialising with friends, completing your daily jobs while indulging in those daydreams. Even better, try your luck with your crush! Here’s how you can do just that!

Be Yourself
This one is self-explanatory. When your crush approaches, losing control of your mind and mouth at the same instance is perfectly normal but it doesn’t get you any favours with your crush. Instead, try acting as normal as possible. “Just behave normally like you do with your friends. Don’t put on an air; if the person likes you then it will be for your natural charm and not for your alter ego. Try sending some subtle signs and check back for any response. If he or she reciprocates, go for it. Otherwise, back off!” says Archita Mitra, a class 12 student.

Find out about your crush
Now, this doesn’t imply stalking your crush by any means. Instead, try finding about his/ her interests, likes, dislikes and whether you both match. If you are on speaking terms with her friends, that’s a plus point. Casually enquire about her. Check whether your crush is single (that’s elementary!). Gradually, confide in your feelings to one of your mutual friends. That can really help you deal with the situation.

Will you make ‘the perfect couple’?
You are smitten by that girl who seemed to have walked right through the gates of heaven. Or it’s that Greek god who has everything on your ‘prince charming checklist’. Introspect a bit and think. Be frank with yourself. Is it just a fantasy that you are taking too far? If there’s nothing that you share in common with your crush, then keep the crush a crush. Just like the ones we have on celebrities, a crush doesn’t always need to materialise into a relationship. If you see a possibility, then the time’s right. Proceed to the next level!

Keep your friends circle intact
Speaking of friends, there’s no reason you ignore your friends in an attempt to woo your crush. According to Apoorva Nanjangud, a student pursuing her SYBMM, “I mostly avoid telling my friends about my crush. They make you so conscious in front of him! But I make sure that I don’t dump them either. I prefer my friends over my crush.” Keep trying your luck with your crush but at the same time, keep your social life intact. They are going to help you deal with your crush and whatever happens later, they are going to be there for you. Give them the respect and time they deserve.

Talking to your crush
You don’t need to be an orator to get this right. Prepare for it. The person who has stolen your heart is the one you want. For any relationship, you must talk to make things work. Recounting her experience, 18-year-old Ashita Adsare says, “Dealing with a crush is fun but can get tricky sometimes! When we think of saying something smart to get his or her attention, we can instead end up saying something really stupid! A crush is an inevitable part of life. Deal with it, but in a smart way!”
Look for any common interests. If you don’t know your crush well, talk to her group of friends loud enough for her to join in. That way, you can at least start a conversation about something. Start small and build on it.

Get those signals right
Now that you have reached the talking stage with your crush, give yourself a pat on the back and move on to the next task. Get to know whether your crush is interested in you or not. You keep bumping into each other, the compliments find a way back to you, the eye signals; these signs can really tell you which way the wind is blowing. If you are not getting favourable signs, persist a while before taking the final plunge.

Say it!
“Girls live with a mindset of ‘I will wait till he asks me out.’ It doesn’t always happen that way!” says 18-year-old Ishiyeta Saxena. “It’s not a compulsion for guys to be expressing themselves first! When you like someone, you are supposed to do something about it.”
Admit it. Your crush has crept into your life like colours on a canvas. All throughout the ‘crush’ period, you keep making up scenes in your mind, in which you hope all will be happy and alright in the end. So give it a shot. Push for the final step. Find some time alone with your crush and speak your heart as sincerely as you can. And if you’re really apprehensive to say it out aloud, just say ‘I like you’.
Dealing with it may seem difficult but it’s possibly the best thing ever. You struggle, learn and end up with a nice stack of memories. At office, in college and during school hours, a crush is inevitable. And so is dealing with it. With cupid’s blessings, make the best out of your experience!

Volume 2 Issue 1